All That Glitters, Isn’t Gold
Sometimes you feel like the world is against you. Sometimes you feel like you don’t have a chance to move forward. But come and think again, sometimes the grass is greener on the other side because it’s fake. And sometimes it glitters because it’s just a bunch of glitter glue. My best friend told me once that not everything you see, you see. We don’t know what kind of bad things there are is.
Sometimes you feel like no one will appreciate you. And when it happens, there’s nothing you can do. Sometimes you feel like you’re falling into a bottomless pit. Or maybe you feel like you meet a dead end, with no way out. And so many things happen in your life that make you feel lesser than a human being.
Those pessimistic, nihilistic thoughts are implanted to yourself by yourself. And it’s there because you don’t feel like you could fit into the society. People demanded you to be this and that. People demanded you to be a better version of yourself (well at least in their eyes and judgment of course). It shapes you to be a pessimistic person with a pessimistic view of life. It’s not necessarily your fault because there are things that we can’t control. However, we need to hang on and stand up for ourselves. To defend our dignity as a human being.
While writing this, I tried my best to make amends with my past selves. Those days when I was overly optimistic about anything, and those days when I felt like nothing. It’s important because before we could make peace with everything around us, we need to make peace with our inner self. Because even though those thoughts are shaped, it is us who can decide what’s best for ourselves.
Although I can only see my friends’ achievements without having one myself, I should not let them shape me. I should be tougher and be more tolerable. Everyone will get their success, on a considerable amount. It takes time, of course, but just like the old man said, you’ll eventually reap what you sow. And sowing negativity isn’t the best option.
Sometimes I let jealousy and rage consume me. And when it happened, I feel like nothing. I keep comparing myself with others. I have unhealthy obsessions with having a soulmate, having a dream job, having a perfect life. But then again, those are shaped by society. Nobody will achieve perfection. But perfection can be shaped by yourself. What’s perfect for others, might not suit you. Keep walking, keep searching. The storm will pass, the sun will shine. You’re precious. Don’t let others shape you, do it by yourself.
